Chapter 375 Self-cognition
Dongfang Changming said with emotion: "Brother, what you said is right."
"I work so hard just to become an ordinary person. Accepting the ordinary is the most extraordinary thing that ordinary people do in their lives. The most important thing for most people in their lives is to accept that they are an ordinary person." Xuanyuan Feng said to Dongfang Changming.
When everyone is born, they think that the world exists for him alone. When he finds that he is wrong, he begins to grow up. There are three growths in life. One is when he finds that he is no longer the center of the world, the other is when he finds that he is powerless no matter how hard he tries, and the third is to accept his or her ordinary time and enjoy the ordinary time.
The only success that is not recognized is the harmony of the family and the dullness of life. Many people always have a plot of glorifying their families in their bones. If they don’t make things happen, they feel that they are not successful enough.
But the real success should be diversified. Owning more than a dozen houses is a success. The family does not quarrel or intrigue, and having a harmonious reunion dinner is also a success.
Keeping a dozen or so Xiaomi is a success in the eyes of some people, but traveling around the world with your beloved is also a success. In the officialdom and workplace, it is success. Some people also devote their youth to children in need, or discover their value in their work.
Life is an experience, an experience. It depends on how you face it.
During the study stage, most people rarely encounter big setbacks and real difficulties. This also gives people an illusion that as long as you work hard enough, all problems can be solved.
However, the more realistic the social environment, the smaller the proportion of personal efforts in the results. The family environment, personal accumulation, social relations, etc. that were ignored in the past are not something that can be obtained by short-term efforts, and ordinary people are likely to not get it. These things play a greater and greater role in the results due to their scarcity.
People gradually find that some heights can never reach, and some people can never exceed them, which will form a strong contrast with the cognition formed over the past for a long time and will be unacceptable at once.
These two factors can easily make people get into such a stubborn person, from past confidence to inferiority, and because of inferiority, they deny the meaning of past efforts, and then cannot find them
To the motivation to continue working hard.
Since I have worked hard for so long and am still so frustrated, why do I have to work hard? It’s better to live a little easier.
Once this mentality of giving up, it is actually difficult to return to the past state of being filled with chicken blood and positive. If it continues to deteriorate, more negative and negative emotions will arise. For example, complaining about the world and feeling that God is unfair to oneself, denying the achievements made by others, and owing other people's achievements entirely to their family background, or cynical, self-admiring, and self-enclosing.
Dongfang Changming went to a small company to deliver goods today, and suddenly met his former classmate Yu Jianyi. He opened a small company. After experiencing the difficulties in the early stages, the company's business slowly got on track and started to make profits.
"It's really difficult to start a business. Yu Jianyi's income is already pretty good compared to his peers, but the company is still too small. Maybe one day it will go bankrupt and have to find another way out." Yu Jianyi sighed.
Later, the two of them talked about Yu Jianyi's state and thoughts during the period of time in college. Dongfang Changming listened carefully to Yu Jianyi's speech, thought for a long time, and finally said that your requirements are too high, and you will never be happy like this.
At first, Yu Jianyi was particularly unaware because Yu Jianyi thought that his requirements were really not high. As long as he made money, he would not be worried about going bankrupt every day. Yu Jianyi did not expect to become a monetary. He had tens of millions of dollars a year, which was better than a well-off society.
Xuanyuan Feng said to him: "Take your experience in college as an example. Let me ask you, how many people in the country can get into Tsinghua University in a year?"
Yu Jianyi said, "It's about 3,000 people. He asked, how many candidates are there in the country every time the college entrance examination is? Yu Jianyi said there are about a few million."
"No matter how you criticize the college entrance examination, the comprehensive quality of those who can get high scores in the college entrance examination will definitely not be much worse. Only more than 3,000 people can go to Tsinghua University in a few million, which means that each of these more than 3,000 people is almost the top talents selected from one in a thousand or even one in a hundred thousand, which almost represents the highest level of the entire country. You deny it because you can't surpass this group of top students in the country. If this is not a high requirement, what is the high requirement?"
Yu Jianyi suddenly didn't know how to answer him. Because at that moment, Yu Jianyi realized that what Dongfang Changming said was the fact, and it was also the fact that Yu Jianyi had been avoiding in his subconscious mind.
In fact, Yu Jianyi was not satisfied with the admission to Tsinghua University. Yu Jianyi also hoped to become the top small group of people in Tsinghua University.
.Not only do you need to learn this way, it is best to be in terms of expertise and economic aspects, Yu Jianyi does not want to be worse than others in every aspect. Once he cannot achieve it, he will start to be anxious, depressed, and even deny himself.
Appropriate dissatisfaction is the source of human progress, but being too dissatisfied means being insatiable. Why should you get everything you want?
Some things can see results when working hard for a short period of time. But many things require a long time of effort, plus luck to achieve it. It may take a generation or even several generations of persistent efforts.
Yu Jianyi and others only saw that their classmates' family backgrounds were better than theirs. They were in developed areas and received better education from childhood to adulthood, which led to their efforts that they could not catch up. Little did they know that their money did not fall from the sky, but was due to the efforts of their fathers and ancestors.
Your current efforts may create the same growth environment for your next generation. But what you are asking is to enjoy the same treatment now and feel that the world is unfair to you.
But if you really can clear the gap with a short period of effort by yourself, what is the fairness of the efforts of several generations of others?
Ultimately, anxiety is because it puts too high requirements for yourself that are unrealistic and incompatible with the rules, is too self-righteous, and does not recognize your position.
When you completely focus on something you can't do, you will ignore what you have done, and your self will definitely continue to weaken, and your denial of yourself will occupy your heart. Once this happens, you will become more depressed, decadent, feel that you are useless, and you will not want to continue working hard and enter a vicious cycle.
Yu Jianyi said, you only see that many Tsinghua students have better grades than you and are better than you in all aspects, but you haven’t seen countless people like Yu Jianyi who work very hard when studying, but in the end they can only go to second-rate schools. You only see that your company’s business is unstable and your profits are not enough, but you haven’t seen that more than 90 companies may be losing money.
Chapter completed!