What does it feel like to like people?

Xu Yan doesn’t know if it’s because she was seriously ill when she was a child and she is not very understanding of love and love.

She learns more about the love between men and women through novels and books.

In junior high school, there were already some precocious girls and boys going to and from school together, and many boys passed by her desk after class.

Xu Yan envies the boys and girls who are together because they look very happy.

I also know what the boys who approached her intentionally or unintentionally were thinking in their hearts, because their eyes had already explained everything.

But it was still too early to junior high school. Whether it was reality or novels, she felt that boys’ love for the opposite sex was not love.

Childish admiration may be accompanied by growth, and there may be a day when you want to mature love.

But that requires the joint efforts of both parties, not unilateral efforts

Xu Yan always felt that someone was waiting for her, so she turned a blind eye to the boy around her.

When she was in high school, she met the first person in her life who could be called a confidant.

Lin Jiajia also likes to read love novels, and her taste is the same as hers. The two exchange views on each other's love.

It is often discussed what love is until midnight.

What is love? Is it the book about men and women being attracted by each other's pheromones, or is it spiritually resonance?

Regarding this, Xu Yan and Lin Jiajia have different views on this for the first time.

Lin Jiajia believes that spiritual resonance is too difficult and requires time to get in. Love should start with pheromones and be loyal to spiritual fit.

Xu Yan disagrees with her point of view. If love begins with pheromones, then the only nature of love is a fairy tale. If you fall in love with someone, you must be loyal to each other spiritually for a lifetime.

This is the first time that Xu Yan and Lin Jiajia have an ambiguity in their view of love.

It was also after that Xu Yan learned that Lin Jiajia actually had a boyfriend who was one year older than him.

The boy is a school basketball team and he is not bad at all. Every time he plays, there are girls watching around the court, and Lin Jiajia is just one of them.

The overly quiet Lin Jiajia actually found such a boyfriend, which was completely beyond Xu Yan's expectations.

Xu Yan has never been in love herself, and she can only remain silent about the relationship between the two.

But is this really good?

Xu Yan was always worried that Lin Jiajia and him could really achieve the spiritual harmony she said?

She didn't want to lose this rare friend, and she hid this worry in her heart.

Until that Christmas.

The basketball team of No. 3 Middle School successfully won the championship in the city's basketball competition. The boys of the basketball team invited the girls from their dormitory to attend the celebration banquet.

There is no teacher, it was spontaneously organized by Lin Jiajia's boyfriend and other school team members.

Xu Yan doesn't like this kind of party that doesn't know too many people, so she didn't go there.

She returned home that day, and a long time later, she received a text message from Lin Jiajia.

‘I can’t do it anymore, save me.’

As soon as he received the text message, Xu Yan panicked and tried hard to call.

But several phone calls were sank, and she finally called the police.

When the police took her to find Lin Jiajia and the others in the hotel, the rest of the school team and the people in their dormitory had already left.

All they found were Lin Jiajia and her boyfriend who were sleeping in the same bed in the hotel room.

Because the two are boyfriend and girlfriend, and both are over 18 years old, the police just contacted the parents and criticized and educated them for a while and left.

This matter is concluded by the conclusion that the young couple has misunderstood others around them.

However, things did not end like this and began to ferment slowly.

The other people in the dormitory were actually related to Xu Yan and Lin Jiajia.

After this incident, Xu Yan often heard them say that Lin Jiajia was willing to go that night, but she was willing to do so, and Xu Yan was meddling in other people's business at all.

In the first few days, they even congratulated Lin Jiajia in strange tone, but as Lin Jiajia did not respond, she gradually disappeared.

The girls in the same dormitory think that Lin Jiajia was originally an introverted person, and it was nothing strange if they didn't respond.

Only Xu Yan noticed that something was wrong with Lin Jiajia and said less to her.

That night, Lin Jiajia would send such a text message. She must have been unwilling to do so. Being hurt by someone she liked should have a great blow to her.

Because he was worried about Lin Jiajia, Xu Yan stayed with her for half a month.

Her boyfriend hasn't seen Lin Jiajia once during this period, and Xu Yan gradually feels uneasy.

Half a month later, Lin Jiajia seemed to be getting better.

When talking to Xu Yan, maybe this is the case for boys. The reason why they didn’t come to her was probably because they felt that they were responsible for her for the first time and spent their time studying and basketball.

They will definitely get married in the future.

When she said this, Lin Jiajia's face was filled with glory Xu Yan had never seen before.

At that moment, Xu Yan thought maybe Lin Jiajia was right, and love should be divided into many kinds. Maybe there are Lin Jiajia, who get on the bus first and then get the ticket back, and you will be happy in the future.

Xu Yan wished the two of them to the end in their hearts.

But the matter was willing to do it. That summer, Xu Yan heard the bad news of Lin Jiajia's suicide.

‘Maybe we were all wrong.’

This is the last text message Xu Yan received from Lin Jiajia.

Are we really wrong?

That winter, it snowed in the south, where it rarely snowed, and Xu Yan was alone in the bed and was shaken like never before.

Xu’s father and mother knew about this and took turns to enlighten her during the Chinese New Year.

Tell her that there are differences between people, there are good people and bad people. Even if you make a mistake, don’t give up hope. Keep your true heart, and there will always be hope in life.

The words of his parents made Xu Yan gradually open the knot in her heart, and she remembered the feeling she felt a long time ago. There was always someone waiting for her.

Life continues, Lin Jiajia leaves, and her boyfriend gets together with another girl who often watches him play basketball.

Xu Yan knew that Lin Jiajia's death must be unrelated to him, but she did not say that this was Lin Jiajia's choice.

Lin Jiajia has few friends, and Xu Yan doesn't want her to be taken out to discuss after her death.

But if she doesn't say it, naturally some people will say it.

Especially on Christmas Eve, the incident of her calling the police was brought up again.

Many people say that Lin Jiajia was killed by her because she called the police and her original wonderful things were disrupted by her, so Lin Jiajia's boyfriend would alienate her girlfriend because of this.

Things were twisted and turned ugly, but Xu Yan couldn't provide enough evidence to defend herself.

Although she had two text messages from Lin Jiajia at that time, one was considered a misunderstanding, and the other was just Lin Jiajia's final lament. No one except themselves understood the feelings and stories contained therein.

In order to maintain her image, her boyfriend also took advantage of the situation and pushed her all the mistakes.

For others, a beautiful campus life is like living in hell for Xu Yan.

In the end, not only the girls but also the boys' eyes changed.

After struggling to reach the second year of high school, Xu Yan still cannot forget about Lin Jiajia.

Everyone seemed to have forgotten this matter, and only occasionally talked in a low voice when their eyes fell on her.

Until one day in physical education class, a basketball rolled in front of her and a boy ran over to pick up the ball.

After the boy got the basketball, he did not leave immediately and looked at her with the basketball.

"It must be very hard for a person alone. Do you want me to help you?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I think you are just alone in school. Everyone seems to have misunderstandings with you, so I might as well explain it to you."

The boy's smile was very cheerful and a little scholarly. Xu Yan wanted to refuse, but the boy had already made a decision without authorization.

"I'll wait for you after school at the back of the library."

After the boy finished speaking, he held the basketball and left.

After school, Xu Yan hesitated for a long time and brought a bottle of gel water to the back of the library.

There is almost no one behind the library. When someone is asked to go to such a place, Xu Yan has already made the worst plan.

If there are too many people, run away directly. If there are too few people, see what he wants to do. If there is an accident, spray his eyes with gel water and then run away.

As a result, when Xu Yandu was behind the library, he was the only one.

"What the hell do you have, I don't need your help."

"Don't be so nervous. I was out of good intentions. Actually, I knew that guy Wang Feng was not a good person."

"The rumors he spread must have made you very distressed. I have evidence in my hand to prove that before Christmas Eve, Wang Feng was on two boats and got along with his current girlfriend."
To be continued...