"My deep memory of it is from you. Su Guo, because of you, I can never forget this place in Nanjing. I always think that if I could go back to that time, I will tell you in person how much I care about you."

After the Qinhuai River cruise, Lao Liu and Jiang Mo went. Su Guo's stomach hurt so much that she was sweating coldly, but she gritted her teeth and walked back to the hotel without saying a word. She didn't want Qin Yao to feel that she was weak and could die if she had an aunt like other girls. But in fact, she really hurt that day, and she had never taken it away. Even if Qin Yao was dull and ignorant, she should have seen her strangeness. But that day, Qin Yao seemed to have something to worry about and was absent-minded in anything she did. Usually, he could at least respond to a question when others asked him, but he hadn't even heard people say it carefully that day. If Su Guo could pay attention to him as usual, then she might have noticed the tears in his eyes on the Qinhuai River that night.

"Some things, some past things, things that I wanted to make it rot in my stomach changed me that day."

Qin Yao almost didn't sleep well that night. A girl kept knocking on his room door to confess to him. After confessing, he ran away without waiting for his reaction. Some girls didn't even come to confess to him but just scold him to say goodbye to the past and youth. Qin Yao would open the door politely and listen patiently. He was not moved at all, no matter the girl crying or scolding. He stood quietly behind the door, expressionless and indifferent.

It was not until the end that Su Guo came in her pajamas. She heard that the girls went to confess to Qin Yao one after another, but she did not stop her from the beginning. She came to Qin Yao after she was sure that no one would appear again. The male classmate who lived with Qin Yao had long been disturbed and ran to the next room to sleep, with Qin Yao alone left in the room.

The door was not closed, Su Guo pushed the door open and saw Qin Yao sitting in front of the floor-to-ceiling window, two or three canned beer bottles scattered beer bottles, and the bottles were empty.

"Say whatever you want," Qin Yao's voice was plain, "I remember to help me close the door when I finish speaking, thank you."

Qin Yao treated her as a girl to confess her love. Su Guoxiu sat behind him on the ground, only one palm away from him. Such a distance made her unable to feel the body temperature on his body, but she could make her lean on his shoulder as soon as she lowered her head.

"If you are tired, go to bed." She murmured, indulging in the night as if she was drunk.

"You are here." Qin Yao heard her voice, but he did not look back, looking at the lights in front of him that were almost silent outside the window in the darkness.

"They just... said what they said in their hearts. Maybe they think they will not have the chance to say these words in the future." Su Guo thought Qin Yao was upset about those girls.

"Is that true," Qin Yao sneered, "What about you, do you have anything to tell me?"

Su Guo shook her head, "No."

"No?" Qin Yao looked back at her in confusion.

Su Guo smiled, "Because I don't think I will not have the chance to talk to you since today."

"Who gave you this kind of confidence?" Qin Yao, who had drunk wine, lost his usual indifference and difficulty getting close. In Su Guo's opinion, he became much more angry, like a worldly fireworks.

So she couldn't help but stretched out her hand, and her index finger fell on his eyebrows, "I myself, the confidence I gave myself. No one's confidence is useful. Only if I believe it, I am really full of confidence!"

After hearing her words, he laughed. Su Guo liked Qin Yao to laugh. Even if she sneered, laughed, or sneered, she liked it because Qin Yao would only smile in front of her. When he smiled, his eyes must be full of her.

"You are really ridiculous."

"What?"

"Do you think there is any difference between yourself and those girls just now?"

"I……"

"Oh, there's still a difference," Qin Yao blocked her hand between her forehead, pinched her chin with her thumb and index finger backwards, and looked at her face, "The difference is that your family lives upstairs."

Su Guo felt that his aunt's pain was not as painful as Qin Yao's heartache!

Su Guo turned her head away and was stubborn and refused to let her tears fall out of her eyes. Over the years, this was not the most ugly thing Qin Yao had ever said to him. If he was willing to say it, she could hold back her heartache. As long as she didn't give up for a day, there would always be a day that was close to success!

"Qin Yao, I am willing to accept the loss." Fifteen years later, Su Guo finally said to Qin Yao, "I lost." Su Guo felt that the moment he was willing to admit that he lost was not as painful as he had imagined, but instead felt relieved.

"I should have given up in Nanjing that time. Then we didn't have to become like this, at least we could still be friends."

Qin Yao took everything lightly. Su Guo understood that it was because he valued something when he was young, but he was easily abandoned and hated. So he buried his love and care deeply, and he did not let anyone know, so he didn't have to make people laugh when he lost it.

Therefore, as proud as Qin Yao, he will definitely not be friends with him.

"If you mind, I can pretend not to know you. If you are friends, I don't care." He has his pride, and she also has her dignity. Qin Yao always slapped her and threw a candy over, and she was really fed up!

"Su Guo!" Qin Yao grabbed her hand.

"Let me go!" Su Guo struggled and tried his best to resist Qin Yao's touch, "Qin Yao, please let me go!"

"I won't let go, Su Guo, I won't let go, why should I let go..." Qin Yao used his unshakable stubborn power to pull Su Guo's body closer to him and let her lean into his arms, "I don't want to lose you, Guoguo, okay, come back?"

When Old Su was doting his daughter, he would call her "Guoguo" intimately; Aunt Fang would also call her "Guoguoguo". But Qin Yao never, when he was a child, when he was in school, even when he was in love, he would call each other's names. What baby, dear Hani, Qin Yao never called Su Guoguo the love name between these couples. Although Su Guo would also regret it, she understood Qin Yao and knew that he had such a personality. For Qin Yao, Su Guoguo, and baby were no different from the symbols in mathematics. They were just a certain code name. Qin Yao would not change his feelings for you accordingly because of changing these titles.

But now he called her "Guoguo", using the intimate name he never said in the past, revealing his fear and helplessness towards losing her. It turned out that he did not want to use the intimate name, but that he did not care about her in the past. But now, he was afraid that he would really leave him, a person who he thought would love him and pursue behind him for the rest of his life, finally decided not to love him and leave him.

"Why are you?" Su Guo understood the disparity between her and Qin Yao's strength. She gave up struggling and let Qin Yao hold her, "What qualifications do you have to prevent me from leaving? Qin Yao, how can you be so selfish! You left when you said you left, and you left me alone. I don't blame you. I can forgive you. Later, you showed up in front of me with Xiao Ye, and I never resented you. You have the right to pursue others. Later, you begged me to get back together, and I dare not say that I have not shaken at all. Until you left me again in the end, I still didn't blame you any more. Because this is your choice, Qin Yao, no matter whether you go or stay, I never interfere with the choice you make!"

"It's because you don't interfere! You can intervene... You can tell me Qin Yao, don't leave, stay. But you never say it, you always let me leave and don't care about my departure!"

"Qin Yao, you are strong or not!" Su Guo broke free from him with great force and said in pain, "It was you who wanted to leave, it was me who left without hesitation! In the end, I blamed me for not trying to keep you! Qin Yao, how could you be so selfish and shameless!"

People in the world always have to wait for a long time until the past leaves, and only then can they realize that what they have given up is what they cherish the most. However, losing means losing is losing, and what they really lose is something they can never be retrieved.

Qin Yao subconsciously covered Su Guo's mouth and let her tears fall on the back of his hand. He looked at her eyes, the eyes that only had his own figure in his eyes since he was twelve years old. Now he no longer liked him fearlessly when he looked at him. Qin Yao understood more than anyone else that he had ruined all this and discarded the most precious relationship between them with his own hands.

But, how reluctant he was! Whether it was leaving five years ago or separation now, Su Guo thought that his departure regardless of her feelings was accompanied by his heart-wrenching pain!

"Guoguo, I didn't mean to leave you," Qin Yao's tears were actually surging than Su Guo's. It was the fact that he suppressed for more than ten years and wanted to tell her about the facts that led to his departure and made him lose her unbearable past. "That time in Nanjing was my first time drinking, not because of the girls who came to confess to me, nor was it a commemoration for the coming-of-age ceremony. But on that day, I heard something, no, it wasn't actually heard, it was the fact."

"No, I don't want to hear what facts you said, it has nothing to do with me!" Su Guo subconsciously wanted to escape from Qin Yao. She didn't want to hear Qin Yao say that he was indifferent to the reason why he left him.

"I'm not my dad's biological son..."

But Qin Yao's words were still the steps of Su Guo's departure that had been successfully stopped. Su Guo stood not far away from Qin Yao. She turned around to look at him with difficulty, but she couldn't see his face clearly, and the sadness on his face. Su Guo suddenly felt that she had never really understood Qin Yao over the years.
Chapter completed!