Staggeringly carrying the "Methyl Amidophos", I opened the courtyard door, tears streaming down my face, and my heart was full of reluctance, but I couldn't find a reason to stay.

In this silent night, only the black tiger pounced on its calf with its front grip, preventing me from leaving. The night was too dark, so dark that I couldn’t see its eyes. But I could hear its low voice.

's mournful cry.

Still, I stepped out of the courtyard gate resolutely and headed towards the river.

Maybe it’s because the weather in late summer is particularly fickle. It rained silently in the night sky, and the wind blew for no reason. In the wind and rain, my body trembled a little. I arrived trembling like this.

On the bridge over the river, place the bottle on the stone pier of the bridge, then slowly climb up the stone pier, and sit down facing the river with your back to the bridge.

In the distant windy and rainy night, there were occasional lightning flashes like brilliant fireworks, bringing brief moments of light, and then endless darkness.

However, at this moment, I have no intention of appreciating the wonders of nature, and can only let the strong wind and waves swallow me up.

I think there will be floods tomorrow. If I drink this bottle of medicine, and then float like a solitary leaf to the embrace of the mother river, and be baptized by the flood mixed with mud and rocks. At dawn, I will float

Towards the distance. If you are lucky enough to be buried under the river bed by this mud, you will return to dust forever, far away from the human world, and avoid the misery of death in the wilderness. Or you may be washed away by mud and water, hit by stones, and be changed beyond recognition, and then you will lie there somewhere.

I died violently on the tidal flats in the wilderness... Of course no one would come to collect my body. My body could only be eaten by flies, maggots and wild dogs. After the skin and flesh were eaten away, a pile of rotten bones was left, and finally it rotted into dregs and returned to dust.

Could it be that this is my "destiny"?

Could it be that I just "accepted my fate" like this?

No! I can't just end my life like this. I want to live. I want to grow up, I want to see the outside world, I want to live freely and have my own happiness.

But another voice is also echoing in my mind. What livelihood do you have? Do you have a future? You don’t even have the land to support yourself. You have nothing but a humble life. Even the rags on your body.

They are all given to you by others. You have no tiles above, no ground below, and your hands are empty. If you try to steal, you can't steal. If you try to rob, you can't win. How can you survive? It's better to die! If you die, it's all over.

No one hits or scolds me. I am neither afraid of the wind nor the rain.

The inner battle between heaven and man, the battle between life and death, is intertwined...

In the end, the thought of "life" defeated the thought of "death".

When the thought of living arose from the bottom of my heart, I was suddenly afraid that I would accidentally fall into the river. I immediately stood up, hugged the cold stone piers of the bridge tightly, and slowly rolled to the bridge deck.

Go up. However, I accidentally kicked off the medicine bottle and dropped it into the river.

At this time, maybe because I woke up, I felt very cold, very painful, very hungry, and very weak. Even my upper and lower teeth couldn't help but tremble against each other, making a clicking sound.

Suddenly, the sound of chains dragging on the ground came from far and near. In this windy and rainy night with lightning and thunder, it was very strange. I actually thought of the legendary "cow head and horse face". Could it be that they came to find me?

Did I "claim my life"? I feel that I am not dead?

While I was scaring myself, a furry thing knocked me down while I was sitting on the bridge.

It stuck out its tongue and kept licking my hands and my face. I felt it, it was not a "cow head" or a "horse face", it was a black tiger. That clattering sound was it

The sound of the chain around his neck dragging on the road as it ran. The poor little guy didn't know how hard he had to use and how much pain he suffered before he broke the chain. He was still running on this windy and rainy night.

Find me so far away.

I hugged it tightly. It snuggled into my arms obediently.

After holding it for a while, I fumbled to untie the knot around its neck and took off the chain.

We had no choice but to return to the place where we could still get shelter from the wind and rain.

Since then, I have become a different person. I have become "obedient" on the outside and "firm" on the inside. "Being obedient" is to try to win the "approval" of others and reduce harm to myself; "firm" is to try my best
Chapter completed!