You can send messages or leave a voice message. As long as it is not the sleeping time, I am basically online, and as one of my close friends, you should not be unclear about this. What is it for someone to have a fatal chain of hindrance in other people's sleep?

I am not a great but mean God. I can't be psychic and cannot guess accurately what other people think in their hearts. Therefore, when she made more than ten consecutive calls to wake me up, and it happened that I was in a state of being irritable and depressed. I could not think rationally, and I couldn't think hard about what she wanted to do. At that moment, I forgot that she was a person who didn't know how to communicate with others, and I also needed more tolerance and understanding.

I just felt seriously disturbed. When my eyes slowly moved away from my phone and threw them to my unsensible lower body, my emotions that had been wandering repeatedly on the edge of anger instantly crossed the red cordon line. As firewood that was already close to the ignition point was ignited to the boiling point like oil and fire, impulse dissatisfaction and confusion occupied every corner of the perceived body. The idea of ​​cursing people emerged from my mind in a silence. The out-of-control emotions made my fingers unable to control the key to answering the phone, biting my lips that had been cracked because they had not absorbed enough water, and preparing to snatch the brewed accusations.

“…I have something that might bring you back…”

"What time do you think? Speak to you in Nanshan, you are very crazy."

Shenniang is a more unpleasant swear word in Nanshan language, but it is also commonly used. The general use has reached the point where "as long as you have one or two friends in Nanshan, you will never be unaware of this word". The meaning is also relatively easy to understand. It is simply translated as the Mandarin "single-hearted son" meaning the same as the Mandarin "single-hearted son". It is not difficult to understand, nor is it afraid of using the wrong place.

In an irrational state, I had no intention of listening to Lin Moli's words. I just interrupted with anger and poured out my inner dissatisfaction. How would the other party feel when he heard these strongly aggressive words, how would his emotions fluctuate or fall, and how bad would his impression of me become. These are not included in the current considerations of my anger.

"... Sorry, it's too extreme. I just want to say that I remember that the doctor who once treated me has now become a rare interdisciplinary physician. He has a deep understanding of mood and mental disorders, and also knows the recovery of spinal cord injury. He is good at comprehensive treatment of patients with physical and mental disorders. I heard that many people have indeed been miraculously cured, and some people have unexpectedly restored most of their normal social functions, including me who can barely communicate with others normally. I told him that he was willing to help you for free. Maybe, can you try it?"

Her words ended.

I also heard a voice saying to me:

I saw hope again.

I could easily understand her anxious and urgent mind and the long-awaited apology in her words. It was just because she was accompanied by a short and fast rapid breath. The sound on the other end of the phone was a little passionate but a little timid, as if she was out of breath and deliberately restrained her breath. Looking at the scene, she obviously wanted to tell the right person about something urgent, but suddenly realized that her behavior caused trouble to others. The guilt of doing bad things with good intentions suddenly rose from the depths of her heart, and the feeling of self-blame like smog may also cover the entire sky for a while.

I originally wanted to pour out my anger, but after listening to what she notified me after listening to what she told me, thinking a little and confirming her intention, my mood on the other end of the phone changed from resentment to gratefulness, and I didn't know how to face her for a moment, and at the same time felt a little guilt and sin.

After careful consideration, I will find out that although she first exposes the apology, whether from her starting point or her mentality of considering her friends, she is not the one who should apologize. If I really want to hold the responsibility accountable and don’t know the reason clearly, I will be furious and harass my purpose with one stick. I am the one who really needs to say "sorry" to the other person who is wholeheartedly giving advice to myself.

It is just because this is a precious friendship that I don’t know how to express and have never had a real touch with my friend opposite the screen, but I hope from the bottom of my heart that the other party can return to normal life and that my physical condition will become more and more beautiful. It is sincere and passionate and worth cherishing.

The thoughts in my mind surged like a spring. When I recalled the more standard Mandarin just now, a feeling of more thankfulness suddenly surged into my heart.

When the Nanshan people who are used to Nanshan language try to communicate with the Feinanshan people in ordinary language, because their Mandarin contains many accents and are not coherent, they can be described as "it's a bit difficult to speak", attracting the ridicule of the ignorant people of the Feinanshan people, and being slandered by the Nanshan people's unique cultural and language essence. Some people even use the Nanshan people's accents as funny memes. These things were not uncommon even around 2030.

But she is an exception and she will not be inferior because of this kind of communication.

Her love for the land under her feet since childhood made her familiar with Nanshan language and Nanshan style, and also made her better understand the various specialties of Nanshan. How should Nanshan be spelled, what kind of classic foods are there in any area, and what kind of unique scenery are there. For her, she can remember it with her eyes closed.

But as a woman who wants to repay Nanshan's dream through excellent results, she needs to be exposed to brand new knowledge every day. A female high school student who is about to be admitted to Nanshan University, in addition to learning the style and language of Nanshan, an understanding of Mandarin and ordinary language is certainly indispensable. She must even be familiar with the skills of communicating with non-Nanshan people to be qualified and not to walk with one leg.

Therefore, whether it is Nanshan or ordinary language, whether it is Nanshan or Mandarin, even if there are minor expression and communication barriers due to illness, and occasionally expressing emotions in inappropriate ways, she can basically switch freely without any burden - that is, she can use the Nanshan language system to communicate with her peers, and can also switch to the ordinary language system when facing non-Nanshan netizens.

Just like when I was outside, I spoke Mandarin, and at home, I might make a big fuss with my family in Dongqing dialect, or clumsyly imitate my friends from Nanshan, Tianshan and other regions, and use extremely unstandard tones to give a sentence of their hometown dialect and send them a private chat in a pronunciation way, which made them burst into laughter.

Yes, my so-called laughter is just a reference to "kind, encouraging, and laughter among partners". For me, people in one region cannot tell the truth about the other region, and they should not laugh with malicious faces, just like the example above.

I will not engage in regional discrimination because of this. I have always supported the view that "we insult a certain area in a map-based manner, slander or despise people of a certain race due to language and culture differences, just because for others, it is their home." I will always uphold the respect between people and the principle of polite communication.

"To be honest, I can accept your starting point, and I am very happy to see that you are willing to think about my condition. After understanding it clearly, I don't mind your actions just now. But is there really hope?"

The rhetorical question I left was filled with strong doubts and a hint of hope that broke through the ground in despair. This was not a logical way of doing things within a day, but this thinking pattern was deeply rooted in my heart: when people say that physical or emotional problems would inevitably improve, my response words were always filled with self-doubt and doubts about others, which always sounded like a feeling of not being confident or not trusting others.

The reason for this should be very simple. However, although I have used up all kinds of treatments for a long time, the overall situation has not improved significantly, which has led to my firm belief that:

This really cannot be improved.

But I heard a voice saying to me:

Don't give up, there is hope.

I still remember when I was paralyzed, I was confident and voluntarily doing all kinds of hard rehabilitation exercises every day, from turning over to sitting upright training, from transfer practice to standing with equipment, and so on, I never complained about too much hardship or fatigue, just because I once firmly believed that paralysis was reversible, and I would eventually defeat the evil disease and use my legs to chase the different winds of the four seasons again.

At that time, I had only one thought in my mind, which was explained in easy-to-understand words, even the so-called: a healthy person may have a hundred dreams, while a disabled person may have only one wish. That wish is to fully recover from the condition, return to school like an ordinary child, and integrate into society as peacefully as an ordinary person.

But as time went by, I gradually realized that no matter what medicine I took, how to exercise the function of the lower limbs and the physical strength of my body, how to do traditional Chinese medicine physiotherapy and acupuncture, my lower body was still as unmoved as dead water, and I did not listen to the instructions of the brain at all, but I would jump and twitch randomly without being ordered. It was obviously because I had no perception, but I often felt so painful that it was indescribable.

For a long time, my passion and burning fire of hope naturally gradually moved towards the point of extinction. I was also unconsciously convinced that my condition could not improve, until I finally firmly believed that there was no room for improvement in my physical condition - yes, I thought I could only be trapped in the disgusting big roulette wheel, shrinking on the sickbed like a pool of stagnant water, silently but firmly finalizing the clock "I can no longer chase the wind with my feet."

But when I grew up, I suddenly realized that I was just controlling my thoughts by negative emotions, but I was actually wrong like "outrageous mother opened the door" and was outrageous. When I mustered up the courage to uncover the veil that covered the truth, the facts behind me were placed in front of me:

The hour and minute hands of the pocket watch are both accurately pointing to thirteen:00:00:00, and there are many illusory feeling of emptiness, but the opportunity to ride the wind again is the opportunity to touch the valve that motivates emotions. Is it true or empty? It is true or dreamy and fictional. I would like to leave everything for you to explore.

Indeed, the accident that was enough to be tied up for my life was like a curse. Even though it was six spring, summer, autumn and winter between that day, whenever I saw my legs that were extremely disgusting, extremely twisted and shrinking to the point where I could not see people, and my deteriorating physical fitness, I subconsciously thought that the disaster arose in the last second.

For me who is now imprisoned by a chair and a sickbed, even if I try my best to lift my legs up, even if I just rely on my own strength to stand again, even if I just put down the heavy and nauseating walking tools carefully, let go of my hands, and then I will take a few steps with a nervous and crooked approach, then suddenly lose my balance and fall to the ground. It may be something I have dreamed of all my life, and it is also a matter of breaking away from the shackles and pursuing my freedom that should belong to me.

As for the second biggest problem I intend to solve, why didn’t I give up expecting the warm sunshine to shine on my body?

I have never stopped craving for eternity to stabilize the valve of control emotions, so that Libra will no longer turn to any extreme side of mania or depression. Whether it encounters extremely joy or sad things, I will no longer feel excited and delusional to myself, as if I am the Lord of Gods, or I am so frustrated that I am so rude that I can't help but knock on the edge of the bed while crying, dragging my complete but incomplete legs to climb up the platform on the top floor to see the scenery of the city. I have also thought countless times, if my emotional world will always be gentle and calm, and not reversing in the biting cold and hot hot weather, and crossing countless times but going back and forth countless times.

What kind of vision should it be?

I heard a voice deep in my heart:

Try again, there is hope.

"…Huh? Don't you believe it?"

The voice on the other end of the phone turned hesitant and low after a slight slap. It felt disappointed but helpless. It was obvious that it was thought that if I did not give myself a chance to try, if the doctor did have a special treatment method to improve me, it might be like standing in front of a successful passage and a fork in the fork in the road, and happens to step into the fork in the road.

I, who was originally the protagonist of this scene, naturally had to make a statement. In the face of such things that only do or do such bipolar answers that are either black or white, I may follow my inner voice and still choose to leave some room for maneuver, so that I can break through the ground and stand in front of the roulette of fate again and pray silently.

So, I noticed the other person's emotions and paused for a few seconds before I put my phone closer to my ears again, and after a little thought, I opened my lips.

"If you have hope, you'll know if you want it."
Chapter completed!